Out of the Woods
by katievee7
Summary: Edward left Bella and she was turned shortly after. As a result, she's spent the last 50 years living deep in the woods to avoid her bloodlust. The Cullens move back to Forks thinking that Bella has grown old and lived her human life. What will happen if they bump into her on a hunting trip? Will Bella be able to move back to society while still controlling her thirst?
1. Chapter 1

Bella POV:

I had spent nearly the last 50 years alone. I've lived my entire new life in my own little sanctuary that I made for myself deep in the woods of the Olympic National Forest. After I was changed, I had no other choice but to flee from my bloodlust; I knew I had no other choice but to run as far away from humans as possible. I've only ever had one close encounter- a pair of hikers that had strayed too far from the trails. Somehow I was able to keep my control, and I retreated further and further into the forest. I can't even remember the last time I was that close to humans again and I never wanted to find out what would happen if one were to wander too close again. I had been able to build a small cottage, nothing fancy by any means, but I had never been one to need much at all. As for clothes and other amenities, I was able to occasionally wander just close enough to hear campers in the woods. I'd wait until they left their tent and supplies to go fish or swim, and then I'd steal any clothes and hygiene products I could find, as well as any supplies I would need for my cottage. I held my breath and as soon as I grabbed what I needed, I would quickly run the miles back to my house. It wasn't exactly the most moral thing I could be doing, but it was better than any alternative options. I truly felt terrible thinking about the hikers coming back only to find that their stuff was gone. Maybe they could blame it on a bear- one with a particular affinity towards women's mediums and shower products.

Living this lifestyle was difficult. I often found myself wondering where I would be if I had stayed a human. I longed for company. I longed for my life before this purgatory. I longed for _him._ The hole in my chest began to present itself again and I pushed the thoughts away. I thought about Charlie and my mom, who were gone by now. I wondered what they thought happened to me- did they think I ran away because of what had happened? Did they think I was kidnapped or in an accident? I wanted so badly to be with them and to have my old life back. But I couldn't. That was no longer a reality for me. Instead, I found myself gazing up at the stars on the wooden roof of my small house. Even on my tough skin, I could feel the splinters of the wood. I wished I had paid more attention in woodshop but made due with what I had, which wasn't much, but my strength sure didn't hurt when tearing apart trees to build the structure. The inside was barren. I mean I didn't need much, no bed and only a few pieces of makeshift furniture. I had a couple seats and a small couch that I had carved out of tree stumps and logs along with a few small shelves that held some supplies: some knives, my clothes, shower supplies, and most importantly, a few books I had been lucky enough to steal from the campers.

My belongings weren't much, and hell, they were barely even _mine_ at all, but the books helped me escape my mundane existence, even if I had read them a million times and had every plot memorized. I was able to bathe and wash my clothes in a nearby stream. People never went there, instead staying downstream miles away, closer to campgrounds. I had to admit though, even when I felt the loneliest, sometimes it was nice to have my own little piece of the woods. It made hunting easy. I was able to find plenty of deer and bears and smaller animals to satiate the thirst between big hunts. I stayed away from mountain lion…for other reasons. I tried my best to always stay full incase I ever ran into a human. As a human, I had never been particularly social, so it made it easier to transition into total isolation. During the days, I'd often wander for miles, being sure to steer clear of any scents or sounds that resembled a human. It was easy for the most part everyone stuck to the national park buildings and managed campgrounds. I loved taking in the rich green scenery and speeding through great distances. Although, many times, I caught myself going at a slow pace, barely faster than a human run or walk. I mean, I had the time and nowhere to be, I might as well attempt to enjoy my surroundings.


	2. Chapter 2

**~AN~**

 **As we know, Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer!**

 **Here's the second chapter! I've been reading fanfiction for years and years and finally decided to write some myself! I hope you all enjoy!**

Chapter 2

Alice POV:

This is it. We were finally moving! I had been begging for years and years to go back to the quiet town of Forks. Yes, I love the big cities, but Forks has always been our permanent home. We had been to several places throughout the last 50 years: New York, Alaska, and most recently Maine were places we stayed at the longest. I was itching with anticipation but also was well aware that something missing- Bella. I missed her dearly. For the longest time, I had held Edward's decision against him, blaming him for our family's emotional state. We all missed her. We all wished for a life with her, especially Esme. She had always longed for a child and I think Bella was the closest thing she ever had. Of course she had us, but I mean a real, _human_ , child. After a few years, I tried my best to forgive Edward for his decision to leave her. I understood that he wouldn't choose this life for anyone, and I think he felt that we would be damning her to a life of a monster.

For a while, he went off on his own. The only way we were able to keep tabs on him was through my visions. Other than that no one really knew what he was doing and for a time Carlisle and Esme were worried he wasn't coming back. Edward never liked to talk about Bella; it was obvious that he was still in love with her. When he finally did come back to us, he was distant. Unattached. Only going through the motions of interacting with us. There were times when I could hear Esme sobbing tearlessly as Carlisle tried to console her. We all heard it. It made our hearts ache to hear her so upset. At times, the emotional instability and heartache were too much for my Jasper to bear, and so we would take a weekend trips away, being sure to never take too long so as not to worry Esme.

In the beginning, we would take turns trying to talk Edward into going back to her. We could all see how miserable he was and it killed us. Even Rosalie took a stab at it. While she agreed with Edward that Bella's life should be lived as a human, she could see how much he loved her. I think the constant harassment of our pleading conversations was part of what drove Edward to live on his own for a while. He was tired of being reminded.

My heart ached even more when I thought of where Bella must be at in her life. She must have a family. Children. Grandchildren. _A husband_. I wished that I could check on her. I tried to peek at her future when we first moved away, but Edward only got angry and the more time we spent gone, the blurrier my visions of her were until they disappeared altogether. Carlisle said that perhaps it was just a product of time and distance.

Everyone was busy packing. We had rented a moving truck and were in the process of gathering all necessary papers and documents to make it look like we were just another family making a move across the country. Carlisle had secured his job at Forks General Hospital and we were planning to enroll in school once we were there. I went upstairs to where Esme was kneeling on the floor wrapping some glass items in newspaper and looking deep in thought.

"Knock knock!" I said in a sing songy voice. Her eyes came into to focus on me.

"Hello dear. How is your packing going?"

"Done mostly. Jasper and I just have a few more things to pack and we're good to go. Are you doing okay? Do you need any help with anything?"

"Oh you know me. I just worry over all the details." She gave me a small reassuring smile.

I sat down next to her on the floor, grabbing some sheets of newspaper and got to work wrapping a vase. She seeming to sink back into whatever worrying thought she was having. Finally I decided to ask.

"What is it Esme? Do you not want to go back?"

"Of course I do dear. Forks has always been my favorite place to live. The people are kind. Car loves that hospital. We all seem to thrive there. I just worry about, well, Edward, I suppose. We all miss Bella dearly. What if she's still there? Older of course, with a family of her own. What if she never left? How will Edward react? I mean it's been 50 years and he's still as much in love with her as day one. I just don't want him running off again. I can't lose him again. Could you…do you think you could just…try to peak?"

I sighed. Wishing more than anything I could, but I had already tried. "I'm sorry Esme. I really wish I could, but I haven't been able to see her in such a long time."

"You don't think that maybe…maybe she's no longer living do you?"

I gulped and looked down. That thought had crossed my mind a few times before, but I tried not to dwell on it. I had brought it up to Carlisle once, and he was quick to dismiss it as well. No one wanted to entertain that possibility.

"Honestly, Esme, I don't know. Part of me wants to say that death isn't the reason I can't see her, because my visions of her seemed to fade out gradually, rather than ceasing at once. Before they stopped, I never saw anything bad happen. I would catch glimpses, snippets of her at school or in Seattle with Charlie- but never an absolute end. I honestly hope she got out of Forks, maybe moved to Florida with her Mom. It would just be easier if she weren't there, especially for Edward. The other part of me just isn't sure. I don't know what happened to her. I've never lost sight of someone like this." Esme didn't respond right away. She seemed to be processing what I had just said. Her hands stilled on the piece of décor she was wrapping and she looked as if she wanted to cry.

"It'll be okay, ya know. We'll get through it as a family." I tried my best to console her. I never want her to be upset.

Her eyes shifted back to me. "Oh hon. I don't mean to worry you. I think I'm just a little nervous. With all the moves we've made over the years, you'd think I'd be fine. But this one just seems different. No one really knows what to expect, and we're used to never having to wonder about the future thanks to a little someone." She gave me a reassuring wink and we both went back to wrapping. She was right though; uncertainty was never really something we had to consider. I almost felt a little guilty that I couldn't be of more help.

By that evening, all of our belongings had been packed away into the moving truck. We were ready. We were anxiously awaiting the next morning when we would pile into the cars and head back to our home. For now, everyone settled into the living room. Each couple sat cooped up next to each other, unintentionally making Edward stick out like a sore thumb. I felt a wave of sadness wash over me thinking about how different our lives might have been if we stayed in Forks to begin with. Edward would have someone. He would be snuggled in with his mate just as everyone else was. Jasper must have felt my shifting emotions because I felt a wave of serenity wash over me like a breath of fresh air. I felt his arms come around me tighter and I leaned into him, embracing the emotional relief he provided me. Here, we sat talking for a while, enjoying our last few hours in this house before we decided it was time to start driving.


	3. Chapter 3

**~AN~**

 **Please leave a constructive review! I love hearing everyone's thoughts! Are we ready to see what's going on in Edward's noggin? Also, leave me a review and tell me who you might like to hear from next (or again)!**

 **P.S. Sorry for the sporadic updates! Ya girl is a college student.**

Chapter 3:

Edward POV

I was hesitant to head back to Forks. For such a small town, it sure held a lot of emotional turmoil. I knew it would make Esme ecstatic though; she loved the town. Theoretically, it was the perfect town for a family of perpetual teenage vampires. I hated that I was the reason we had even hesitated to go back to begin with. I didn't want to cause my family so much pain, and I knew that's what I was doing. When you live as long as we do, there aren't many things you regret. We have so many chances and do-overs. We're constantly moving around and having fresh starts. But with each fresh start it's only a painful reminder of the biggest regret of my existence. For a while I couldn't take it. I had to be alone- away from my family and their thoughts.

We arrived in town at our usual place of residence. I had to laugh at the thought. We were walking oxymorons. Ever-changing. Ever the same. Always frozen in time yet always moving. It was like living and reliving the same lives a million times, and yet completely different all at once. We had moved and moved and moved again and yet this felt completely foreign to us. There was an uncomfortable level of uncertainty in this move. No one really knew what to expect and at the same time we knew _exactly_ what to expect.

Unlike us, the people of Forks never moved. Maybe that's part of the reason we were drawn to it. Forks was constant. The people were the same- always relatives of the people who had lived here in the years prior. Forks was our routine; we were always able to pick off exactly where we left off, seemingly without missing a beat. Carlisle would be at the hospital, Esme would get involved in various philanthropic opportunities, and the rest of us would be off to school.

I had moved my boxes to my room and was standing on the small balcony outside of my bedroom. My head was filled with thoughts of our brand new, old life.

"Woah woah woah! Tone it down, brother. You wouldn't want to give us the impression that you're excited to be here!" My thoughts were interrupted by a booming voice. I had to grin at his antics. Emmett was standing in the frame of the glass doors behind me. I sighed and turned around, leaning against the iron railing. A small smile played at my lips and I took a deep breath and blew it out exaggeratedly.

"Well you see, Em. If I were as enthusiastic on the outside as I am on the inside, Carlisle may have to take me to the hospital and commit me." Of course he knew I was lying but I didn't give him the change to cut in. "Plus, between you and the pixie, I would have to worry about the structural integrity of ol' faithful here if I were to join in." I bantered; patting the railing I was leaning on- referring to the house.

His laugh practically echoed. He bounced on his feet and crossed his arms across his chest. I could practically see his smart-assery about to come out of his mouth.

"Well by all means, join in. The demise of "ol' faithful" would just give Esme a reason to redecorate." Yup. _Smart-assery._

"As if she needs another reason to stress, you oaf."

"Nah- you do enough of that for all of us." His face shifted from playful to slightly more serious- but only about as serious as Emmett could ever get, which meant the shadow of a grin still threatened to make an appearance.

I couldn't deny it. I was tightly wound with all things considered. Well, with one very large thing considered. _Her._ Emmett must have seen my train of thought make its way to my face.

"You miss her." It was obvious who he was talking about. It wasn't a question.

I shrugged and avoided his eye contact. "It had to happen, Emmett."

"She was your mate." This was also not a question.

"She was _human_ , Emmett. It's been 50 years. We need to let it go."

"What if she's still here in Forks?"

"She's not." My tone was a little more clipped than I had intended.

"Dude what if she is? How would that be any different than any other family in this town that stays here through generations? And how the hell do you even know? Alice hasn't been able to see her in years. For all we know that could mean she's dea—"

"That's enough, Emmett." I didn't want to hear that. Of course it's always been in the back of my mind. That's what happens to humans, of course. That alternative was worlds better than this life. "I didn't want this life for her. She was too good for it."

"Too good? What is that supposed to mean?" He was becoming irritated.

"It means given the choice no one should have to live this life, especially not her."

"Aren't you just the least bit curious about what happened, Edward?"

"It's none of my business. It's not yours either. We all need to leave it alone. We came here to start over again."

"Oh please, Eddie, we all know you've been hung up on her for the past half a century. I mean it's understandable- I mean you were in love with her. Why did you never go back?"

He wasn't the only one getting irritated but I was trying to keep my cool. Emmett and I had never really spoke about this is detail, but he accidentally let it slip into his thoughts a few times before pushing the thought away with some stupid joke. Emmett was usually pretty good at hiding his thoughts. I think out of everyone, he understood the most how hard it was for me to never have silence. No one gave him enough credit for being so intuitive.

"It was never my place to take away her humanity. She was better off living her life. I would never have been able to live with myself if I took that away willingly." He seemed to contemplate that for a few beats before sighing and looking at his feet. His next words came out softer.

"I was human when Rose met me." I could see where he was going with this.

"That's different. You were dying Em. She had a whole life ahead of her."

"Yeah but…Rose and Carlisle could have chosen not to change me." I didn't know what to say to that. Honestly, I couldn't have imagined our family without Emmett. Lord knows Rosalie would be even more insufferable than usual.

"That was their choice then. And I made mine. We all have our opinions on this life."

Emmett was still quieter than his usual self, obviously taking in what I was saying. "Can I ask one more question?"

"Will you drop it afterwards?" I just wanted to be done with this conversation.

He nodded before continuing, "If given then chance, would you make the same decision?" My breathing caught and I was thankful I didn't actually need the air. For once I found myself wishing he wasn't so good at hiding these thoughts so I had a chance to brace myself.

I took a long time to answer. I waited for my breath to come back to me while I thought about it.

"I think I may have stayed a while longer, but I could never bring myself to changer her." The thought of going back to her had crossed my mind a few years after we left and I was living on my own, but at that point I figured she had moved on. That's just what humans do. They change quickly whereas we are forever frozen in time. They fall in and out of love like season changes; we fall in love and time freezes. I knew I couldn't go back to her. I couldn't ruin whatever progress she had made only to yank her selfishly back into a life with me. One where she would continue to age, and I would not. I would have had to give her up eventually, it was just better to do it when she could still go and build a family and a life and accomplish her goals. Go to college. Find someone. Have a child. Everything I wish I could have done in my human life.

"How do you know you would have been able to leave her human?"

"You said one more question, Emmett." From my voice he knew I had been pushed too far and was done with the conversation. His facial features morphed back into his normal goofy grin as if it was a mask being snapped back into place.

"Well unpack, kiddo. We have school on Monday and your ugly mug needs as much beauty rest as you can get this weekend." He winked and turned to leave. I rolled my eyes and turned around to look at our wooded backyard. I could hear Emmett trample down the hallway yell "COWABUNGAAAA" as he hopped over the railing of the staircase. Esme's chastising voice was accompanied by the slight shaking of the house. As I mentioned- _structural integrity._ I chuckled slightly and shook my head. Emmett was a lot to handle but I was always thankful for his comic relief.

I could hear everyone continuing to unpack their belongings. Our strength and speed made the work load much lighter. Within only a few hours the house was looking almost like we had never left. From my room I could hear Alice's twinkling laugh as she and Esme rearranged the living room. Everyone's thoughts were focused on beginning anew yet it still seemed like we were stuck on the past. As much as I don't like to think about it she changed us all. _Bella_ changed _us-_ not the other way around. She had been family to us- to me. My heart will forever be pained by her absence and I could only hope that my attempt at giving her a normal life was not futile. For the first time in a long time I prayed. I prayed that she had gotten out of the small town of Forks and was happy wherever she was.


End file.
